Evaluation of my presentation

I think my presentation had its strong and weak  points, my presentation seemed to work well, with the main points on the board and myself talking to expand on these, as the 'senior proffessionals' could look at the points and listen to me explain them.  I did feel like i was repeating myself ab it and maybe didn't explain so me points as well as i possible could have done. They were very slip in what they thought about my idea and how successfully they thought it would be. The main issue that arises was that i hadn't thought through my idea and researched Leukemia well enough, as it is unlikely that the boy would have it when he was a little boy and still have it at the age of twenty eight. Although they did like the idea of my opening, they thought it needed slightly changing. We had a little discussion and thought about possible changes; such as: instead of having little children playing a park, i could have a teenager picking up his GCSE results after recently being diagnosed and still have the narration over the top talking about how people treat him differently ext.. This could work well as it will appeal more to my target audience as it  is based around a boy of the particular age.  Another idea was to possible focus on the bullying aspect and make the boy be a bully, until he becomes diagnosed and then changes the way he treats people and show him being bullied. To focus on the message that everyone is the same and should be treated the same, also to focus on the issue of bullying. I agreed with them on this and am currently thinking about which way will work best to change my film.  Another issue that arised was that it was still quite similar to My sisters keeper, so i should think about what makes it different? and how i could emphasis the difference? The only answer i could reply was that in my film it will be based around the romance aspect and love, although on reflection i think i could make it different by focusssing on the bullying aspect. I think this exercise was very usefull and worthwhile in doing as it has made me open my eyes to the fine detail and to realise that i need to do more specific research to improve my film, make it more unique and different so that my target audience would want to go and see it and has given me good experience at doing a media presentation.